I know I've been a bad blogger. I started a new job shortly after my last post and I am still struggling to balance everything. Well I guess better late than never.....The girls had a very fun Halloween. This was the first year Ella could "participate" and she loved it--all of it. The attention (everyone told her how cute she was), the candy, being out late. Malina, almost a seasoned pro (this being her 2nd year Trick-or-treating)was very good at making the night progress. The first house we went to, Ella picked a piece of candy and then Malina proclaimed "my turn" and then "next house". We live in Puyallup, which if you didn't know, is parent-mecca for raising little babies, and a pretty cool little town. There were ALOT of kids out, which the girls loved, and Malina said "Happy Halloween" to every single one of them.


This year my mom threw a Halloween party, I missed about half of it because I had to work but, it looked like the girls had fun with their cousins.

Happy Mommy's Day

My Mom's Day started out with me almost getting breakfast in bed. Unfortunately I had to work this morning. I still got breakfast, in was just at our kitchen table right before I went to work. That's OK because I can't really say I "own" this holiday anyway. My mom is one pretty awesome mom and I feel like all the kudos should go to her; I would never have been a good mom if it wasn't for her guidance, love, and wonderful example.

The nice thing was that I did get off work early and was able to see my brothers and sisters (in-law) and my very adorable nephews, as well as my mom and dad. It had been awhile since we had seen all of them and no one had seen Ella's newest cool trick: walking. She will do it whenever she isn't thinking about it, she will just let go of whatever she was holding onto and go for it. But if she gets excited or wants to move in a hurry, she just completely forgets it and crawls.

I still can't believe how "big" she is; I should say that I only use that term figuratively because she is only in the 10th percentile but she is starting to act like a "big" kid and not a baby. She has a whole bag of tricks she'll show you, if your patient enough. Her big kid tricks include: waving, clapping, kissing, walking, riding Malina's quad (or at least trying REALLY hard; she just can't keep her balance, poor thing gets sooo mad), saying "mama" & "dada", drinking from an open mouthed cup (as opposed to a sippy cup) and all kinds of other things.

All in all, this was a very nice mother's day. I love being a mom, and I am fortunate enough to have an awesome mom of my own, who inspires me and teaches me every day.

T W I N S








If you have two small children, as I do, you have an innate understanding for the NEED of reliable transportation for them. By transportation, I don't mean a car but rather what you would need to transport them in once they are OUT OF the car. This can sometimes be a tricky matter, depending on what your needs are. I have two children; one who can't walk, and one who can walk but doesn't want to all the time = dilemma. A typical toddler/ baby stroller which has a little seat on the back for the toddler to sit when she/he is tired was just out of the question because Malina doesn't just rest when she's tired, she lounges. And until recently Ella had been too little for any regular type of double stroller, not to mention the fact that they are big, bulky and hard to handle (or I so previously thought). My method of transportation involved Ella, while seated in her infant car seat, (yes, because she is still that little) being clicked into our single stroller and Malina walking next to me with a leash on. Yes, I said a leash. She wore it like a backpack, it was in the shape of a monkey and the "leash" was the monkey's tail. Does that make me a horrible mom for treating my kid like a dog, maybe but I didn't make her eat out of a dog dish or anything. : ) And it allowed me to keep her from running in the street in front of a car or being abducted by some pedophile while I was attending to Ella. (Just FYI you can go on-line to find out how many registered sex offenders live near you at www.sexcriminals.com/regs/1328.html. In a 25 mile radius from my house there are 100. And that doesn't include the sex offenders who didn't register. SCARY)

This travel arrangement didn't work out so well whenever Malina decided she was tired of walking and was going to throw a massive fit. My only option was to leave the store immediately and drag Malina (literally) kicking and screaming the whole way to the car. Needless to say, we made our trips as short as possible. But I decided Ella was big enough for a double stroller and I went on-line and found one that seemed to meet our needs. And WAH-LAH!! We tried it out today, and let me just say that it is amazing! They both can be strapped down, there is cup holders, it is not too big and it maneuvers quite nicely!

Although the first person we spotted while taking a stroll in our new transportation device was a woman in her mid-30's who cried out, "oh my, can I look at them?" That would seem like a weird question to someone who doesn't have kids, it makes it sound like they are carnival freaks or something. But what she was really asking was, "is it okay for me to approach your children and while respecting your boundaries and theirs, look at how adorable they are and talk to you about them a little bit?" This I have no problem with. I could probably talk all day about how adorable, smart, terrific, etc. my kids are. But then she said "are they boys?", this is the one thing that gets under my nerves. Not so much about the fact they think my children are boys because let's face it, as babies, we have no distinguishing marks of either femininity or masculinity, that is what puberty is for but typically in our culture, pink = girl and blue = boy. That is just common sense. The picture above is EXACTLY what the girls looked like when she made that comment. And then I got the feeling by the way she was looking at them that she thought they were twins. So I said, "uh, no they are both girls but they aren't twins, they are 13 mo. apart". She said "oh, really? OK", like she still didn't believe me but wasn't going to argue the point and then kept on walking.

The next 10 people we passed weren't interested in their gender but they did want to know if they were twins. By the 8th person, I just started saying "yes".

*******A LONG TEN DAYS*******

One thing I have utterly NO TOLERANCE for is being in pain and/or sick. When I have either or both of these things I am rude, selfish, emotionally immature, and entirely focused on myself and feeling better. So, I do all that I can to avoid getting injured and staying healthy. Which I suppose is why I have never broken (or sprained) anything; rarely, if ever get sick; and certainly try my very best to be drugged during childbirth. (1 out of 2 aint bad)

Unfortunately children, on the other hand, are a breeding ground for germs; runny noses, drooling, hands in the mouth, eating stuff off the floor ( I didn't say "food", I said "stuff". Just becasue it's not edible doesn't mean Malina AND Ella won't try and eat it!)

Up until 10 days ago we had been pretty lucky. Ella hadn't been sick yet, and the worst thing Malina ever got was a "little too high fever"-once when she was 4 mo. old. But then, on Tuesday, on the way home from Little Gym Malina puked in her carseat and my 10 day l-o-n-g household ordeal of puke/worry/diarrhea/fever/no sleep/headache/bad cold began. First it started with Malina. Then, Ella got sick, more Malina, Dave came home early from work sick, more Malina and Ella, Ella going to the emergency room because she wouldn't stop puking, Dave again, then me, then little bit more Malina and a lot more Ella. I mean, the thing just wouldn't stop! Right when I thought Ella or Malina were over this monster flu, they would puke, have a nasty diaper, or get another fever.

Although some of the nice things about the babies being sick is that they were very snuggly and lovey. Ella by nature is a very lovey baby but Malina is not. If you want to sum my girls up with two words each they would be: for Ella "love me", and for Malina "entertain me". Not only was Malina more lovey but also much more clingy and insisted on doing what I did.

(NOTE: I am rather computer illiterate, and for some reason my pictures keep posting sideways. Which is fine, I suppose but my neck is starting to hurt. So if someone wants to tell me how to rotate them I wouldn't mind!)

Her favorite thing these past 10 days was to dress up in my apron or coat and walk around with her baby giving her pretend juice from her cup and pretend medicine from a dropper I had given her and then putting her baby to bed. Then she would bring her finger to her mouth as to say "shh baby sleeping, be quiet". Which is what I say to her when Ella takes a nap.

I would like to say I learned a valuable life lesson from these past ten days. That through the trials and tribulations of taking care of 3 simaltaneously sick people, I had a deeper understanding of life. But the only thing I learned was "don't get sick."

Vanity
Now that I finally have my own computer, I am (slowly) learning how to do things on it. My newest accomplishment is transferring my pix from the awesome digital camera Dave got me for my B-Day onto the computer. And it was at this moment, as I was going through these pictures that I came across this one
<---------------- And I realized that Malina does look a little bit like me; she certainly has my eyes and (although you can't see them in this picture) she definitely has my ears! Ella does too. Most parents, I would say, believe that from the first time their child comes out of the womb; even covered with blood and junk, that their little baby is perfect. Ten toes, ten fingers, two eyes, one nose, one mouth, and two ears all perfectly formed to create the most beautiful, amazing little creature you have ever seen. As a parent of two beautiful girls, I can definitely say I agree with that; there is nothing I would change about my girls! And yet, as I am thinking this, looking at this picture, I realize how much I really dislike my own ears. I had thought about plastic surgery to alter them; my left ear sticks out a little more than my right ear. I didn't think it was too big a deal, something I just wanted to do for my own satisfaction. My cousin Sean had his largely protruding ears pinned back and I thought they looked wonderful.

But what if I did get plastic surgery on my ears? It is pretty obvious Malina & Ella have my ears and as they get older they might want to know why I would change them. Should I tell my 'beautiful, absolutely perfect' daughters that I thought my ears were funny looking?
What would that be saying about them and their ears? I wouldn't want them to get plastic surgery to change the way they looked; they don't need it. So how can I believe that my ears are only beautiful and perfect on someone else?

It's amazing how vanity and self- consciousness has crept in without me realizing it. It seems that my daughter's are teaching me more than I am teaching them!

Let me dive into the shallow pool now (I was getting kinda deep there) and announce that Malina has officially said her first spanish word. I have been speaking fluent Spanglish to her since she was born and she comprehends alot in English and Spanish. If I ask her where her shoes are in Spanish, she understands and will bring me her shoes but, when she hands them to me she insistantly says "shuuss'. And so on with the other English words she knows. Not that there are many. So far she says: "shuss" = shoes

"cuppa" = cup

"mom" = mom

"dada" = dad

"knah" = Nuk

"umma" = grandma

"sisssy" = sister

"sisissy" = Chrissy (Dave's niece)

But today I was taking Dave's mom to Blockbuster and we were getting in the car and I was trying to cajole Malina into the car by saying "come on Malina, do you want to sit by Chrissy?" . And very excitedly she replied, "si ! si!" I was absolutely thrilled! I was starting to think that my expert Spanglish lessons were going in one (beautiful) ear and out the other (beautiful ear!)

Dropping the baby (err I mean) When the baby drops!



I am now 32 wks and very excited and anxious to have little Ella. During the last couple of weeks of pregnancy most woman feel the baby "drop" as a way of getting into position for child birth. Well, since my hips are as wide as the Grand Canyon (I can thank puberty and a weird set of genes for that one) the baby can "drop" any time she wants to, and then move back up, and then drop again. It is apparently "free range" in my uterus with the baby moseying any where she wants to. The benefit to this, however, is that the baby has plenty of room to pass through the birth canal when I go into labor, so I really don't have to worry about her getting "stuck" and needing a C-section.

Little Ella is still boring and healthy but after my last trip to the midwife I find out she is a little on the small side. This is to be expected since I am only average and Dave, himself is not a large man. Plus, even though Malina was a full-term (and 3 days) baby and I gained 40 lbs., she still only weighed 6 1/2 lbs at birth. But the troubling thing is that the height of my fundus is not matching how many weeks I am. Wait sorry, let me put that in non-baby terms. When I go to the mid-wife she measures the "length of my stomach" (which for some reason they call the "fundus") in centimeters. That number should correlate to approximately how many weeks pregnant I am; give or take 2 centimeters. I was always right on the mark with Malina but my last measurement was off by 3 centimeters (too small, that is). And my weight was a little low. After your 20 wk mark, a pregnant woman should gain about a pound/ week until the baby is born. I have been seeing my midwife every 4 wks, so at this last weigh-in I should have gained 4 more lbs. from before, but I have only gained 2 lbs. This does not seem to worry my mid-wife, at least not yet. ( I am sure if I come in next time with a small "fundus" and low weight gain it will worry her) But it certainly has me concerned. This may seem minor, and it probably is but I don't want it to turn into something major. My only thought is that I need to eat more! Yes! NO. You would think that a pregnant woman would have no problem eating, and if you have ever seem me satisfying a craving you would know. But that is the problem. Food for me is not appetizing at all unless it is something I am craving (and then it is pure food nirvana). So now I have been wandering around the grocery store aimlessly, circling the aisles, trying to get a craving for something. Which has led me to some crazy food combinations. My latest is hot dogs (no bun) dipped in eggplant humus.

Dave seems to be managing my mood swings and food cravings alot easier this time around. It could be because he just started a new job and is pleasantly distracted by that instead. I am very happy with the new place he is working because he works about 20 hrs. less, never on the weekend, and he gets paid more an hour. The downside of course is that he is not working with his best friend anymore. That is why he got a new job; Jason and Dave had some "creative differences" that apparently couldn't be resolved. The whole thing has left Dave a little downtrodden but being able to put his daughter to sleep every night (which he didn't get to do before) has certainly helped.

Speaking of Malina Fay, who is almost.....Gasp......One years old, is well on her way to walking. But as I have said before she is a very cautious child and doesn't like to take chances; its more like calculated risks. She will not walk around the room if you are just holding her hands, with nothing in front of her. She will on the other hand, walk, stand, and bend down if she has something in front of her she can push, like a: kid-sized car, her walker, or a toy she has that resembles a lawn mower. The fact that she will take her time and consider every angle before really doing something makes me feel better, as though she won't recklessly put herself in harms way, as some other eager-to-learn babies might. But at the same time it is frustrating because, little Ella is coming soon and I don't want to have to try and carry 2 babies at the same time. (I mean, what if I dropped one of them? Or both!!)

All things condsidered our little life here seems to be going pretty smoothly. We won't be moving exactly the way we wanted to; instead of moving to another apartment complex with a w/d in the apartment we are moving to an apartment insided our same complex that has the w/d room literally right next door. We can't move until the end of June and although the apartment isn't very far away from where we are now the thought of not having Ella's room set up until she is only a couple of weeks away makes me anxious. Especially since I like to do things myself and I really probably need some help to get everything the way I want it. (DISCLAIMER: I know being pregnant makes me moodier and more stubborn than I was before and I would like to apologize in advance to anyone I yell at and/ or offend while they may be helping me move and/or setting up Ella's room. I am sorry, I really don't mean it and I very much appreciate your help.) But I guess if Cameron and Sara can do it, there is no reason why we can't give it the ol' college try. And besides we don't have to move as far as they did, nor do we have as much stuff. Still I will feel better once we are moved and settled in and the only thing I really have to worry about is enjoying alone time with Malina before Ella comes.

Boring and Healthy






While I was pregnant, and during my delivery with Malina the common phrase from my midwife was "boring and healthy". That is to say that I was healthy with no complications and so was the baby. Well it appears to be a common theme with me because once again, with this baby, I am "boring and healthy". You will note I say this with some dismay, and in truth I don't actually want anything to be wrong with my little baby or myself but it seems as though when I was pregnant with Malina every little tincey, tiny "boring" thing was such a big deal. I mean, just being pregnant was a big deal. And for some reason it isn't that way now. Maybe it's because I've already had a baby and I know what to expect or maybe it's just that I'm busy enough taking care of Malina that I don't have time to be constantly obsessing over the little one in my belly. (I mean, even the Quad Screen which is known for being notoriously false-positive came back completely negative first time around!)

I am now 25 wks (6 mo.) pregnant and once again officially not enjoying my pregnancy. My back now starts to hurt all the time and I have to literally hold my belly and roll it over with me at night, to move positions. Although I did learn my lesson from my last pregnancy and I have spared no expense to buy pregnancy clothes that are comfortable and fit me correctly. Last time I had such an issue buying the expensive maternity clothes that I thought I would only be wearing for the 9 mo. I was pregnant (and the 9 mo. after, but I was naive and thought I would be wearing my old clothes right after I gave birth. Ha!) that I was miserably hot and uncomfortable and not enjoyable to be around. But this time is much better.

We do have a name picked out for our little girl, with much deliberation we decided we liked .............Ella Noeme Howard..........(I know, Noeme? How do you say that? Well if you seen it in the dictionary spelled phonetically it would look like this --> "Noemee" with the first 'e' short and the second 'e' long.) So it will be .......Malina Fay & Ella Noeme.......the Howard girls.

Malina has now mastered the art of crawling with her stomach off the floor and very quickly has added the ability to pull herself up into a standing position and to fall smack dab on her butt. This is something she is truly an expert at because, since she first pulled herself up and then teetered over and fell on her head and started crying, she decided that was not the way to do things. So, after that she would pull herself up, then while still holding on, she would stick her butt out, lean back and fall, on purpose, smack dab on her butt. Then she would pull herself up and do that over and over again. Watching her one night, I counted 20 times in a row. I guess she figured if she was going to fall she might as well learn to do on the cushiest part of her body. My baby is a genius! Well, maybe a little Einstein she is not but, at least she isn't stupid.

Everything else is going just as fine as can be expected. We would like to move in the next month- month and a half to an apartment we like that is gated and has a washer and dryer (because let's face it, I will be doing alot of laundry.) And I have planned to continue working until the end of June, depending on how I feel of course. Watching the other 2 kids and Malina isn't as hard as it may sound, the only thing is, as with all children is that it's not harder to do things, it just takes longer to do them. So really all you need is patience and not worry about any kind of agenda- unless it's to have fun.

Girl Power


About two weeks ago we had our ultrasound and officially it is a girl! We did want a boy (not that there is anything wrong with a girl--or so Dave keeps telling himself) but it would have been nice to have the experience of raising both a girl and boy. Suddenly, I realized that Dave will be in a house surrounded by women (girls), but more importantly, I will be surrounded by girls. Yes, I am stating the obvious but the problem is, suddenly I am not so sure that I am a suitable role model to raise two girls; two girls to be well rounded, loving, free thinking, bold, creative, entertaining, likeable adults. That's a lot of pressure. I know that one isn't even walking yet and the other isn't born but my family is predominantly male, so I'm not sure I even know how to act around a bunch of girls. Well, that's not true exactly, but I definitely get along better with guys than girls. I guess my biggest concern is that I am not a "girly-girl" at all, so how am I going to teach two girls (let alone one) to be feminine? Suddenly I have urges to get fake nails (which I hate), go shopping, wear makeup all the time, and (gasp) shave my legs more than once a week! I'm sure it will pass, it just seems to be the newest thing worrying me.

Other than that the baby is doing fine. I am 20 weeks along now, and officially due as of July 23 rd. Although it feels like she is coming out now. She will wedge herself into a tight little corner in my womb and then do somersaults, rolling over and over, as if she looking for a weak point in the uterus-defense line where she can break through. The whole thing is kinda painful and kinda enjoyable; I never felt this much activity from Malina.

Speaking of Ms. Malina Fay, she is an astounding 9 mo. now and I cannot believe how quickly she is learning new skills. She crawls now, on her stomach, and can move rather quickly across the room if she gets proper motivation (usually a favorite toy, or our DVDs that she seems adamant on getting into--the downside to her new mobility) She had tried crawling with her stomach off the ground, in true crawling fashion, alternating knee then hand but as soon a she put a hand down her elbow collasped under the weight (of her giant head perhaps? really, the thing is huge!) and she fell face first onto the carpet. Poor thing! So, needless to say she hasn't tried crawling up off the ground and may not for a little while still--I am ok with that. My little baby is getting to big to fast. She has been a chubbo-fatty-fat for a couple months now (92 percentile for weight & only 50 percentile for height) but it seems she is starting to lengthen out and I am guessing that at her next doctors appt. her height will have caught up with her weight. And her top two teeth finally came through (at the same time) and we are trying to get her to eat more solidy type foods but she is rather reluctant (Dave's word for it is "lazy") but she seems to be catching on to the whole drinking from a cup thing. She can even almost drink by herself, I just have to watch her because she likes to tip it upside down and shake it !

It's alive!!!




Ok, as I have previously stated, my hopes for this blog was to keep family and friends informed of our lives but turns out it's a lot harder than I thought to keep up with this thing. That is probably because I don't have a computer at home and so I use the one at the library and it takes some planning to get down there. Malina is now officially 20 lbs. and we upgraded her to a "convertable" car seat. Don't get excited, it's not as cool as it sounds; there is no reclining top and it is an ugly grey color (I guess I was hoping it would resemble the car that shares its namesake but it doesn't) The tough thing about this new car seat is that I have to physically unbuckle her in and out of it, which means I have to wake her up if she's sleeping; which is every time she rides in the car. This is kinda tricky in the morning since I leave for work at 5:15 am, and I don't want Malina getting in the habit of getting up at that time every day. Oh, in case anyone didn't know, I "work" for friends of ours babysitting their 2 kids, ages 3 & 4. It's nice to have a job where I can take Malina with me, I couldn't imagine putting her in a daycare......not because I wouldn't trust the people to do a good job but rather, then I would miss all the "first" things she did, all the cute stuff that gets lost in it's retelling, the "you just should've been there kind of thing". That is something I don't envy about Dave, with his normal, getting to talk like an adult job, he does miss out a little in that respect.

Speaking of Dave and his "grown up" job; also his dangerous job. Just last week he shot himself in the foot. Now, Dave is sorta clumsy by nature but this was more because of the poor conditions of the job he was working on. He went to the hospital and when they did the x-rays, they found the nail went straight thru a bone in his toe but it didn't shatter, just a straight clean hole. They also gave him an antibiotic and vicodin, or his "happy pill" as we call it. For the most part he just wouldn't rest his foot even though I strongly encouraged him to just relax; I think he referred to me as a "rest nazi". Well to say the least when he went back to work his foot was killing him and he couldn't take his vicodin because your not supposed to.

I am now 15 wks pregnant with "baby lo". Now that I am in my 2nd trimester, most of my morning sickness is gone (thank goodness) and I am feeling as close to normal as possible. I really do hate being pregnant. There I said it, go ahead tie me to a wooden stake and crucify me as the worst mother in the world! But you know what? I am probably not the only person who has ever felt that way and it's not like I started out with the notion that pregnancy is horrible. Actually, all of the magazines I read and all the people I talked to describred pregnancy as "a life changing experience", "the best I have ever felt", and (my favorite) "postively glowing". I admit my pregnancies are a life changing experiences but I certainly have felt better in my life and I have never once 'glowed'. There is very little I enjoy about the chaos that pregnancy wreaks on my mind, body and soul but, the one good thing there is seems to make all that seem trivial. And don't you know, just last week it happened. I felt the baby move! Most people would say that it isn't possible, that it's probably gas but I know the difference. I could feel Malina this early too. The funny thing about it is that although at this stage in the baby's development in my womb, baby lo has plenty of room to stretch out and do somersaults if he wants but, instead wants to go to the very corner of the womb and push.......like he is testing his boudaries. (already) That, is the only thing I enjoy about being pregnant.

Here we go again!

I have started this blog with the idea that my friends and family can read how Dave, Mallina, and I are doing, since I have the tendency to not call anyone back. I really do mean to keep in touch, it's just that I don't like talking on the phone......So the blog seemed like the answer. Let me start by catching everyone up to now. We found out that we were pregnant just before Thanksgiving of '04. To say the least we were very excited; we had been "trying" for almost 2 yrs. and we had come to the conclusion that I couldn't get pregnant. (big misconception) Malina Fay Howard was born on June 7, 2005 with not too much hassle. Not trying to brag or anything but, I was only in labor for 16 hrs., everything went very smoothly, and I considered the labor to be pretty easy. Malina was a tiny 6 lbs. 8 oz. (at full term) and didn't really seem to gain a lot of weight for the first couple of months. When Malina was 3 months old we started supplementing her with formula and she gained weight very rapidly. She went from being in the 15th percentile for weight when we started the supplementation to, now at 6 mo., she is in the 85th percentile and a whopping 18 lbs. Malina got her first tooth when she was 2 mo. old and another tooth came in at 3 mo. She hasn't since got any more but, we'll see. She sleeps through the night and came sit up almost on her own. She doesn't crawl yet either but can still manage to move herself around in 360 degree circles. She is a very happy baby and likes to go visiting friends and relatives; she is definitely a "people person". The only time she really gets fussy is if we haven't gone somewhere all day and she is bored of looking at just me.

Now it seems our family has been blessed again; just before Thanksgiving of this year (deja vu) we found out that I was pregnant again. (So much for that theory that I couldn't get pregnant) Malina, only 5 mo. old when I got pregnant, will be just a little bit over a year when "baby lo" as we refer to it, will be born. When we started telling family and friends about our little news, everyone was shocked, and I thought the first question they would ask would be "was the baby planned ?" But that question was never asked, not once. Well, it seems that when you have children that close together it is not your life planning that people question but your sanity. Most people remarked "are you crazy ?" or "I'm sory." As if this was the worse thing that has ever happened to us and our lives are ruined. But that is not the case at all. If anything, are lives are more enriched. (get ready for a cliche moment) No one told me that just looking at my baby would make me love her more deeply and profoundly than I have ever loved anyone before; most people don't get to experience love like that once in their lives, let alone twice. So no the baby wasn't unplanned but that doesn't mean it is unwanted. I am very excited to be a mommy for the second time.

Dave on the other hand, took a little while to come around. While my thoughts focused on how much love I had to give this little one, Dave's only thought was how little money we had to support this baby. I'm not exactly sure how he came to this conclusion since I am the one who handles all of our bills and finances (Dave doesn't even know how much are bills are each month) and I figured we would be just fine. But he was stressed and started working more overtime than he did already. Slowly but surely he has calmed down, working normal hours again. And I knew he had started to see things from my point of view when, just the other day he said "hey you know, we might get a boy this time."